An Experience of Death!

This post below (Part 1) is from my original page ‘The Death’ up on the menu bar. It was an encounter that I was privileged to experience and feel with spirit in my journey to understand my fears as I go through life. It was also a very profound and life changing event that has changed me forever. I was shown just what happens as we let go of this journey of life down here, the emotions, feelings…but most of all, the understanding that what we have experienced down here, isn’t the end of the journey…but a profound learning in building that unconditional love in us all.

For others that have read this post, I’m also adding a new section (Part 2), at the bottom of this post for something that I found I needed time to digest and understand, as it was very much outside what we normally view as death. We usually view it from where we are now at, down here contemplating ‘is this it’, ‘what comes next’. But the view I am adding is what I was shown from our spiritual side and just what this journey means to us, as a spiritual being experiencing ‘life’ in our journey.

This can be quite confronting, depending on your beliefs and attitude towards death, but it also does something else that I feel needs to be shown, and that is a truth that will ease our fear of death and help remove that ‘unknown’ factor, at least enough to allow us to understand our journey down here a little better and how we view what we think is the ‘so called’ final act within it.

In removing something that we carry with us all our lives, it can do something wonderful…allow us to live…free from a fear that weighs us down like any fear, and be the truth within, no longer reacting to things around us, but acting from choice and choosing to live while we are down here in this beautiful place!

Part 1.


Um, let’s change the subject!

Why? Are you afraid of death? I was, and I have to admit something here, not only was I afraid of death, I totally swept it under the carpet and didn’t want to go there unless I absolutely had to. A family member or friend passes away and you have no choice but to bring it back into view and face that thing that hovers in the back of your mind to which we block nearly all the time. It’s healthy to respect our time down here and know it’s for a finite time. Our fear is only produced because of how we are brought up around it and that little thing called the ‘unknown’ when we finally go there.

Now if it was an easy thing to do we would give it no wisdom, no respect and end it all because things were getting hard and life was becoming quite painful. But that fear, that unknown, allows us to give it the respect it deserves. Like all other aspects of our lives, The Love, The Fear, The Heart, The Truth etc, we do not know or understand these until we go through that journey that relates to each and every aspect of ourselves. That hard and sometimes quite painful time so that we can experience each facet that is our true selves so that we can understand and gain that wisdom of all of these to create the balance that is as unique as it is beautiful. Like a diamond. No two ever the same but indescribably beautiful in their own right.

I felt this on different occasions and it wasn’t until I read a book called ‘Journey Of Souls’ by Michael Newton that I let out this huge sigh and felt this incredible release, and understood and realised I was holding in this absolute fear, ticking away underneath, of a time that IT was going to sneak up on me and drag me away. The explanation in this book had finally touched something within me and for the first time in my life I could let go of this ‘thing’ that had been a part of me, kept in denial, and affecting a lot of things I did, felt and understood within my life. It was amazing just how it affected my attitudes and directions I would take because of that fear. I felt almost afraid to do things that would appear to be simple to most people (then again for them, maybe they weren’t), but kept me from stretching out, and to put it bluntly, live!

So after reading this book about the journey of souls as told by a lot of people under hypnosis, explaining the different aspects of the soul and how it integrates with our bodies in its journey, I let this fear go. The relief and realisation that I had let this affect me in so many ways also let me understand that like all other aspects of our learning and wisdom, I needed to feel that side first (The Reverse), before I could move into that, release and understand where I had come from, so I could now move into where I wanted to be. So many things that had been affected by my holding that fear was now being looked at from such a different space like night and day. The let go, the release, and actually just be me. All this time I had thought I was me. Not even close. I could now see because I had let down that protection, the walls that I had around me, physically and emotionally, I had now let myself see further than ever before. Step out into life differently, freely and more accepting of just why I’m here. I could now see beyond the wall and realise I was deliberately choosing to live. And that fear, the fear of dying, was the wall, and it was keeping me from living. Always it’s the reverse of what we think it is, but with that understanding we begin to realise it’s always the fears that keep us from really going where we want to go. And when we finally realise this, the walls come down, the fear subsides and at last, with the blinkers removed, the vista changes to one of wonder. Of a new experience, a new attitude and a new way of being.

Now up to this point I had thought that I had a good understanding of just what death was, an end to a path that had given me the wisdom and knowledge to realise my truth by releasing so many fears and balancing out my life in such a way as to be able to come from a place within that was truly unconditional. Little did I know. Now don’t get me wrong, ALL I have previously said is my truth, and also very much needed to understand my path as I strive to live on this planet. Spirit in its wisdom let me absorb all that went before so I could truly understand it, integrate it within and be able to express it properly here so that others may understand. But there was one thing missing from the equation that I have mentioned previously, and that is true understanding, to actually experience and feel the action so that you really do understand what has occurred. Like my previous comment, ‘you can be told that if you put your hand in the fire it will hurt’, but you never truly understand it until you do actually burn your hand, and know the incredible pain, agony and hurt that is created by that act. Something you never forget and can describe in detail because of the physical and emotional imprint it leaves on you.

Well, to show you how incredible this journey can become, spirit came to me one night and showed me just what it was that I needed to understand as part of my sojourn on this lovely blue planet so that I can express it here and give you some understanding and idea of just what it is we are here for. Now again, I say that this is my journey, but having said that we can all go on a trip to the city or into the country but some will walk, some will take a bus or train and some will even go in a Lamborghini. The whole purpose is to realise what it means to you in doing this trip. I might not even like Lamborghini’s, but I’d love to go for a trip in one though! Just for that experience. Anyway, this is always about you and what you want to understand and feel that this journey does for you.

Now the following is an account of that incredible experience I had during that night, that brought together quite a few of the subjects that I have been writing about. I had been speaking to several friends about the subject of mortality because of the situation I now find myself in. I had been diagnosed with emphysema at the grand young age of 54 (take note of my smoking for 18 yrs, from 18 to 36yrs old, and working within a coal dust environment for the same period, give it up guys!), and was beginning to realise that this had taken place quite quickly. I had only noticed how serious it was over the last 3 years as I was getting quite short of breath and just thought my studies and writing at a computer was generating a lack of exercise and the relevant lack of fitness. So I now found myself realising that this isn’t what I really wanted out of life, I wanted more time, more quality of giving to life’s better things. What are those better things? I soon realised that when your mortality begins to knock on your door, those things I spoke of before, as in wanting to do things that didn’t seem important, and letting go of things that were important at the time, that no longer seemed important anymore, you begin to see your entire journey from a very different perspective. It lets you look back and understand where you have come from, what you have achieved within yourself, and then adjust accordingly to where your heart wants you to go. To give meaning to your journey and give a truth to just what it is that you wish to become within you.

Now at this point of time I had not had much sleep for three consecutive nights so was quite tired so I fell asleep quite quickly and solidly, but at about 4am spirit brought me up to ‘our’ conversation depth (explained in ‘The Dreaming’), and began to show me an understanding that quite literally took my breath away with it’s incredible inclusion of most of what I’ve written about before under the menu headings, and of how this all fits together. Spirit then also showed me something that left me so totally speechless that when I became aware enough to reach over and record this I actually turned the recorder on and just sat there with my mouth wide open and could not utter a thing. It was so profound that all I could feel was this total elation of understanding, grinning from ear to ear with tears running down my face. And after what seemed like ages I started to speak in a totally awed and quiet voice this vision that spirit had given me as an understanding of this journey that we all take, to find us, to create that beautiful creature that is inside each and every one of us, to finally reach that part we all yearn for and become…an enlightened being!

And this is how it works. All of our lives we have lots of fears that we create, cope with and adapt to within our day to day living. These fears are usually quite strong so they seriously affect what we do and so determine our journey by how much power we give those fears. When we go through a fear the huge release that is generated by this action allows the release of walls we have built, physically in the body as well as emotionally, and opens us up quite strongly to a physical release of endorphins etc and an emotional release by crying or screaming out in joy because you have come through such an amazing experience. This is an ‘enlightenment’, an understanding of what went before, what was endured and what you now feel afterwards. I don’t mean we are now ‘enlightened’, what is referred to as someone who has evolved to such a point that they no longer need the physical journey we are now on. But, I do mean it is an ‘enlightenment’ because it creates an understanding for that particular part of what you needed to understand in this part of your journey.

Now as we cover all these fears within our lives we become more ‘enlightened’ on our path to such a point that your ‘wisdom’ and ‘understanding’ has reached a place that allows you to impart this wisdom to those around you just by being who you now are. Those fears include all those things in our lives like The Love, The Reverse, The Truth so they are integrated into just who you are. You have reached a point that you are more comfortable in who you are, what has meaning for you and you integrate that meaning into your daily life. There’s just one more to go, the one thing that we joke about, avoid, deny, won’t talk about unless we have to, and that is our death. We say and give our condolence’s to friends and family and go through some of the most horrendous times in our lives due to the loss of those family and friends and this gets us the closest to it, but we still do not want to dwell on it in any way. And this is very understandable, who wants to die? Who wants this life to end, and more to the point….what ‘IS THERE’ when we finally let go of this path that we are now on?

I’m now going to put into words something that I find difficult to say in the least. I saw what spirit showed me, I understood what spirit showed me and most certainly felt what spirit showed me. But after all that…the experience left me in such an uplifted state of wonder that I feel I may belittle it for my lack of words or description. It’s like a beautiful sunset. You can say it was beautiful, wonderful and an amazing splendour…but when asked to describe it you say…well, it had oranges and purples and a blue background behind it with a yellow sun….and it just doesn’t do it justice in any way. So…here is my understanding of something that we all will one day touch, feel and understand so as to become that which we all wish to become. That ‘Enlightened’ being that has reached its nadir, its peak, it’s understanding of self.

So spirit says ‘You’re going to die!’. Now if you have read my story under The Love you’ll understand my reply of ‘Speak to the hand!’. And to top that off I already had the understanding that spirit had showed me (in November 2010), that I was going to die when I was 60 years old. At the time I was in the most incredible place of falling in love with the most wonderful woman in the world. I could have moved mountains, smiling like an idiot and loving every moment. And out of the blue one night spirit bobbed up and told me that I was going to die at 60 yrs old. Unusual because I always get a panoramic understanding of anything I get from spirit, a total data set that explains the what, why, where etc. But in this instance it was so abrupt and singular that it left a huge imprint on me by the fact that it was so direct and to the point. Now I know why. I needed to be in that space so that I could understand my journey, my mortality and be able to express this here, and now give this understanding for all that read this and take this journey as well.

Well, spirit thankfully thinks differently to me and with the most loving kindness, gently showed me my journey, how I was going to get there and the reason why I would experience this part of my life. After many, many years of dealing with my lower emotions of anger, hate, fear and balancing them with the happiness, love, and truth using The Reverse, The Heart, The Love, The Dreaming etc as my guide to understanding, and in that understanding releasing those fears that guided my life on an everyday basis, it was time for spirit to show me the final act. The one thing that must be faced that we obstinately refuse to touch, and for a very good reason. As I have said before, we only ever learn something when it has a big impact on our lives, affects us in such a way that we cannot but help to learn something from it, and because of that learn the wisdom that is a part of that lesson. Well this is no different. If it was easy, every time we hit a brick wall of pain, hurt and a loveless time in our lives we would just end it all…and miss the one thing that all this is trying to give us, that understanding, the wisdom, so that we can find the ‘enlightened’ and beautiful creature within that we are trying to become. And as life goes on after each of these hard times in our lives we begin to accept that this is an important part of our journey.

It is a very abrupt, to the point, in your face, meeting with death. You begin to realise that this is it, no turning back or maybe tomorrow is a better day. You have to finally stare it in the face. And it was then that I realised something, while I was seeing this ending, this last act….I was going over many, many things that I had said, did, felt and done with many people in my life, I was…letting them all go…releasing all that had gone before…understood that what I had given was the best I could do and accepting of that…and then another understanding came with that…this was in fact a grieving of that life…something that we never seemed to allow ourselves because society says ‘get up, keep going, be strong’. Which is fine for the support that we desperately need at those times in our lives…but do we truly grieve properly…let go of all those hurts and pain that are a part of this time in our lives…that release and acceptance of what we felt for the loss of that partner, friend or family that we were so close to. But in this instance it is the loss of ourselves…the releasing and letting go of who and what we are…that final thing because there IS nothing else…there is no life to turn back to…no getting on with our lives…trying to pull everything back together and begin again…it is the last let go…total and utter release…and just be.

Going into that grief is to totally let everything go. No hanging on to something to support us. The whole idea at the end is to ‘let go’, ‘release all’ to accept and allow self to come through. It’s a total embracing of death that allows the transition. It is giving to self ‘unconditionally’ and accept who and what you truly are within. The relief is incredible. It’s like the release of the entire worlds troubles and the acceptance of unconditional love all at once. It is very difficult to put this into enough words that it can be understood and embraced for all the different things that it means all at once. Like being in a fairground with so many colours, actions, voices and people all around. It gives such an incredible feeling of wonder, excitement and happiness from all that is around you, that you don’t need to understand it, it just is, and you accept it for what it is. Now, truthfully, that description of a fairground is not close, that is just an idea that may give you an understanding of what I’m trying to explain. When all is said and done, it is just ‘total perfection’. I think even a diamond has its flaws, but not this, this IS a total knowing and feeling of the love and beauty of this wonderful universe that we are a part of…eternally!

And this led to another realisation…spirit on its own cannot touch, feel or sense as is done from within this physical body…it is a total, unique sensation and understanding in its own right. It is a never before taken pathway to be shown and given wisdom for the understanding of unconditional love. It is then that I also realise that the actual journey within this body that we do here on this physical plane on Earth, is such an incredible blessing, to be part of such a beautiful creation to enable us to reach such a point within so that we may be complete. It’s a path that can be so painful, so lovely, so at odds from one moment to the next, that when it is that final time, that last step on your journey to finish who you are, and what you have become, the awareness and beauty that is finally understood, gives such an indescribable joy within as you realise it is all totally there in utter perfection for exactly who you are so that you may understand it and know it’s purpose. Regardless of all the mistakes, problems and horrible times that we have endured it is exactly what we needed to do, so that we can find and understand just who we are within.

It was then that I felt it…I’m wishing to cry at this very moment because of the beauty and love of what this moment means…the understanding of all that went before, the feeling of completeness, the truth of accepting the love that was integrated in all that I had done, the knowing that I can now let go, I am realising that it’s over. I’m coming back to who I really am. Returning to that instance of total and unconditional love. Truly a total acceptance of just being as one again. And as I let go and accept, I feel a release of my body, but there is no fear, no worry of ‘what if’, it’s a complete release of that Lamborghini that has seen me out for many, many years and release it with love as part of who I once was. I am now ‘coming home!’. Coming home to what I’ve always been and now realise, I am. The journey before is now the thing that is ‘not real’. Totally understood but now realised within to be an incredible experience and to add to something that is a completion of who I am. The love that is a part of us always, no matter where we are!

To finally understand this journey, that process of life and the many amazing things that we do within that life, I can now look back and truthfully see, feel and understand it’s purpose. All those things that we toss away in frustration, yell at in anger and even those moments where we really lose it and do some of those things that we totally regret forever are here for a reason. They show you….you! It makes you look inside and talk to yourself over and over and over. Trying to understand why, how you can change it and most importantly give you understanding as to whether you want to be like that or create something better that you do want to be. It’s a long slow process, even though sometimes you want to get off this crazy ride. But in hindsight you will realise that you are probably glad that it did take it’s time and you were able to really gain the understanding and wisdom that is needed for that journey. All of the things that spirit showed me were for my benefit, but for me to understand I needed to go through and feel each and every part so that I may fully understand it all. From the ‘dark night of the soul’ to truly look within after a horrendous part of my life, to understanding myself within so I could partake of life again, then give from each understanding I made as it was integrated into who I was. Each and every aspect I was given changed everything. Allowed me to drop more and more fears so that I could be who I truly am, and more importantly have the understanding that it all comes back to that one thing that everything is a part of…unconditional love! When you finally understand it, it’s meaning, it’s place and it’s part of creating everything by being a total process. The up’s, the down’s, the hate and the love, you then understand it IS a total part of everything. You cannot have one without the other. It is an incredible perfection that allows us all, with all our so called imperfections, to be totally loved and included individually within this beautiful place, and be helped and guided to reach that wisdom and the total love that is there for all.

Just remember, this creation we are a part of, this body that is helping you on your journey, your spirit within that whispers to your heart, is all here for you. It is your time, your creating expression from what you have learned and understood, and your building of that beautiful creature within so that you may reach that place that we all yearn for while on this journey down here. That place of total and unconditional love where all is in place within, the final and total acceptance and love of ourselves, makes us the perfect creation we are meant to be. And finally reach that place, that yearning to connect, and be a part of all that is.

Part 2.

The above post is everything that I was shown on that journey with spirit…bar one other ‘small’ event that has taken me some time to digest, simply because it is something I have never seen before. And I will be the first to admit that it rocked me, simply because this life teaches a very high understanding of our journey, but as for death, very little. And maybe it is for me to understand for MY journey. Like what I have written above, you may ‘see’ much within it or only confirm what is already known for yourself. Most information can be felt by the truth it portrays within you. You can ‘feel’ a truth by simply in how it makes you feel within. When you sit and speak your heart, totally open, to another, it is a very peaceful, releasing and positive feeling for you. If it is not a truth, it is felt as a binding, uncomfortable and negative experience.

WARNING: Please read all of this section in total or it can be taken out of context. Within your spiritual or soul form you are totally ‘aware’ of everything all at once. There are NO confusing ‘what if’s’ or ‘maybe’s’ or any hesitation whatsoever. You just are. I’m trying to explain something that is a very small fraction of what I felt as part of that whole. As I spoke above of that ‘fairground’ feeling with so much happening around you all at once, it is a million times more complex….but so very much simpler within that state.

Death continued….

So there I was…taking in such an enormity but total understanding of that process of letting go, transferring from that human relating of life to what I really am within, that all knowing, beautiful and peaceful soul that is my normal state. I was in such a loving place that I felt complete, I was home. And in that split second of letting go to start moving towards ‘whatever’ was next…I’ll never know…until I do actually die. Spirit had blocked any further understanding from that point. But in that split second before then, I had seen and felt an incredible understanding that shocked me, and I think that is what had broken my connection with spirit at that point, purposely, so that I could understand what I had been shown.

What I had been shown up to that point is all that mattered for now, it is all that I needed to understand and relate to for where my journey has been going. That split second held a wealth of information and it has taken me over two years to digest and come to terms with what had been shown. And not because of what I was actually shown, as it was a very small piece of that event, but by what it meant to me back down here. (By the way, my references to ‘up there’ or ‘down here’ is just for ease of understanding).

I saw and felt the Earth (down there), but it was disappearing very quickly…but that wasn’t what rocked me…it was the feelings and thoughts that went with it. All I could sense at that time was…it is done…let it go, release it…it has served its purpose. Even the people that I loved and held so close…no longer mattered. I was shocked by my off handed manner. My journey had been completed and so what went before was now irrelevant. There was no longer anything to worry about, I had done what my soul needed to do. Now remember that this is instantaneous, everything is just ‘done’…if I thought I knew what living in the ‘now’ was, I really didn’t have a clue till I felt all of this…it just ‘was’. I’m trying to explain something so that you can understand what I was trying to come to grips with. And it was shown to me this way so I could understand it ‘up there’, and then relate it ‘down here’

Now, if you thought the above was in your face, that’s understandable. So this next bit I’m going to try to explain it in my way the best I can so that you can ‘see’ something and allow you to relate to it properly.

The above didn’t matter to me for a very simple reason…I ‘knew’ that I would see them all again. I didn’t need to think about them in any way quite simply because I didn’t need to worry about it. There were no thoughts of ‘what if’, ‘when’, ‘how’, ‘why’ etc. Remember, the soul is instant, that ‘knowing’ is all. We are only slowed down on Earth to absorb what we are experiencing in human form. Up here it just ‘is’. Now please, do not think that our loved ones are not within our soul/spirits thoughts…with great love they are FULLY aware of our journey back down here and what we are experiencing so that we will be complete in our understanding. I’m only relating this tiny piece for the simple reason that it has great meaning for us to realise ‘some’ of what is happening ‘up here’.

To give this more understanding, let me explain it this way. Let’s say that you are spending time with a friend, you’ve met them at your rendezvous, spent a good time together and you now decide to go to your place for a cup of coffee. Your friend says ‘I’m just going by my house so I can pick some flowers, I’ll meet you at your place in 20 minutes’. You go home and prepare the coffee. In that 20 minutes you do not give your friend a second thought. You have no reason to think anything about them, to worry or even think that they wouldn’t be turning up.
WHY….because there is no need to give it any thought….just as your soul/spirit is doing ‘up there’. They KNOW you will be together again, there is no reason to even think otherwise, it is a ‘known’ quantity. The time between when they have passed over and left the Earth, and when you will be together again, is but a moment.

And I think the reason it has taken me so long to digest all of this, and put into words, is because I have never looked at it in this way. Down here is a whirlwind of ‘what if’s’ of what is ‘up there’. A lifetime of not knowing, and to be truthful because of that, not wanting to look at it. Suddenly I’ve been shown something that really does affect a lifetime’s way of being.

So, what DOES this mean for us ‘down here’? Everything! It allows us to release a fear, you know, one of those things than we drag around all over. Those things that test us in so many ways so that we can go through them and find that love that is inside us all. This journey has so much beauty within it, even though those tough moments really test us to such a degree. I have seen something that has given me such a relief, release and such a greater outlook on life. It is a game changer in everything that I do BECAUSE of that understanding about death.

For most of us we have touched death in varied ways. Acquaintances, friends and those very heartfelt connections of our loved ones that have passed over. The grief is one thing that holds us so tightly because of the loss of that loved one and the beauty that was shared, within that loss. But grief has a huge purpose, it allows us to see and feel something that is built on a love like no other. It also allows us, by that loss and pain, to look within and find another love, one built on the empathy that comes from going through such a time, a healing love that leads to that love within.

I have written this above to give an understanding so that our journey may be a little less fear and pain, and a little more healing love inside so that our paths in that awareness will be built on a stronger love and empathy, and a knowledge that what is waiting, is a beauty beyond anything I could describe. We will miss those that we love, but we will also be with them again…the flowers they are picking as they drop in home…will be a love and beauty like no other.

Ask anyone who is in their sunset years knows how fast time really goes down here, it is much faster than we give it credit, and we can see that as we get older. It is a very short time, and within it is crammed a huge amount of beauty, all so we can find ourselves, that unconditional love that is a part of us all. All too soon this magic is swapped for another (up there). But down here, this magic cannot be experienced up there, that is why we are here. This is ‘our time’ to find that beauty within, not to be experienced in this way ever again. Our journey has great meaning for us all…and then we too will be sharing those beautiful flowers with those we love again.


45 thoughts on “An Experience of Death!

  1. I had my visitor, as you know. I didn’t get as detailed information as you did. What I got was a great sense of peace, a re-assurance of what I already believed to be true. After reading this lovely post of yours, I think I have a much better understanding, putting it together with what I received from my visitor. Thanks so much for another great and inspiring post. If everybody would just literally stop and smell the roses, they would get a piece of the pie, as well. I have absolutely no fear of dying and leaving this body behind. I know there is so much more. This is just a starting point, a place to experience things we won’t need when we go “there.” A place to start the process of really truly getting to know ourselves from within. A place to release all the anxiety and fear. We won’t be needing any of that “on the other side.” I think I might just have to pick me up that book!!!!! Can’t wait to read it. Namaste……………………………..Peace out…………………………….XXXX πŸ™‚

    1. Thank you Tammy. It is an incredible journey, just as you found with your visitor. So much more behind what we now see and feel, layers upon layers, all beautifully interconnected so perfectly, each talking to us to create the magic of unconditional love, in all its glory.
      And yes, no more fear, worry or any of all those other worldly things that seem to attach on contact. We are cleaning out the closet, with very much purpose, so that we appreciate the end product, the beauty we are within.
      Thank you for sharing Tammy, and just as an aside…that book was something that was ‘my’ trigger. It may not do the same for anyone else, but it was a very interesting read regardless, very intriguing πŸ™‚ Namaste

  2. Thank you Mark for this amazing post! I am still processing what I just read. I’m sure I will read it again. What a journey. Blessings to you.

    1. My pleasure Vee. So many people see it, and fear it, it holds them in such a place that it holds them back from really living. And that too does have a purpose or we would not give it (and ourselves), any respect and end it all at the first hurdle we come across.
      But in that understanding we can really love ourselves by focusing on our journey here, find that love that is within us all in each and every adventure that we dare. Find us, and be free because of it.
      It is a hard journey, but it is in that hardness that we do find that empathy and love of ourselves and others by experiencing it fully. It shows us how to break through and change what we are, to what we want to become, that everlasting search for that one love, that beauty that we all seek within.
      Thank you for sharing Vee, may your journey also be with a great love in your heart. Namaste

  3. Incredible!! Wow!! Reading that book was one of the things that inspired me to go on to the Newton Institute Past Life Hypnotherapy training and become a practitioner myself! Going into past lives and the life between lives, and guiding people to do the same blew my world wide open, in the best and most expansive way. Thank you so much for sharing such details and a personal account of what you experienced! Incredible insights and awareness gained, thank you so much for sharing this for us all to feast on πŸ™‚ Sending you love, Sharon

    1. Many thanks Sharon. I think the main thing that the book did for me was it confirmed the sense that there was so much more ‘later’ on.
      And more than that, it was the magic I knew was ‘there’ after experiencing so many things within my life.
      Many things happen in our lives to which we aren’t quite sure if they happened or not…but once I really opened and wanted to explore, the light came on and in that beautiful glow I could now really ‘see’ what has always been there.
      It was just (just I say πŸ™‚ ), a matter of unblocking my view by removing those fears that we hang onto, but only because we are afraid of them and won’t look within to understand what it is that drives them. They hurt so we just automatically avoid them, a defense mechanism if you will.
      And that has purpose too, so that when we do finally look within, understand what they mean, it releases those walls and suddenly the view goes on forever.
      And what we can see, inside and out, is a whole new world πŸ™‚
      My experience above brought together so much of what I had already ‘touched’, and it left me with such an incredible understanding of our entire journey. After it was over I floated for weeks because of that beautiful place and has never left me in its wonder that I know will always be a part of what I am.
      Thank you for sharing Sharon, I hope it gave you a little light for that angel assistance you give to the many in your counseling. That ‘help’ is a guidance like no other as we all go through our ‘stuff’, it makes it just that much easier to drive these windy roads that we have in this life πŸ™‚ Much love to you also kind lady, Mark.

  4. there are so many books that could be recommended. I do remember and it is on line, the chapter 40-43? where Yogananda speaks with his deceased guru. The Master guru actually resurrects for sometime to give evidence and a description of the other side.. “Autobiography of a Yogi.”.

    1. Thank you Eve. It is an amazing thing to experience and finally ‘just be’, at one with everything around me.
      All of this world and its struggle to find myself is released, and the peace and beauty I felt I could fill a book and still never touch the edges πŸ™‚
      I shall look for that book, thank you very much for sharing that. Mark

      1. yes, i can imagine. there are many you tubes from Leslie Flint on this.. You may like to find out more about Leslie Flint – and his wonderful ability to contact spirit.

  5. I forgot to include that this state of feeling as though every one of my billions of cells was filled with LOVE began before I died. The “transition” actually began seconds prior to my heart stopping. When I left my body I had no body. πŸ™‚

    1. Thank you for this, it actually does explain a lot to me in how we view our spirit within, and its connection to our bodies.
      I had another ‘event’ where I had passed out but found myself looking at my body from the side and listening to others speaking around me.
      Maybe my connection is a little ‘loose’ πŸ˜€
      But more to the point, it showed me that I could ‘let go’ and experience all that I have with spirit to share on here πŸ™‚

      1. The Miracle to me, Mark, is that in my “3D Life” most people do not wish to acknowledge what I have to share. Yet here on WP I am not able to respond to all that come to Petals in just one day. SO many seek my blog where the Light of Love is just so evident. I hope one day to have like minded souls in my actual life where I can be Gifted just to be with them to talk and talk and share. Perhaps that is not part of my Life Plan. All I can say is between what I do, caring for special needs cats, being married to a special man who served in Vietnam, taking care of this body that has special needs, I really do not even see where I could fit these so called people in. My blog and what I do there keeps me hopping. Much of my work is behind the scenes, communicating with others, Loving, sharing, encouraging, befriending, lifting up, giving a “Touch of my Energy” …. (smile) All makes my head spin at times. I give a lot of me, Mark, with the Intention of making a difference and changing Hearts one by one. (((HUGS))) Amy <3

        1. You are a miracle within yourself Amy. Just by touching the many in your day to day, as well as your blog posts, will touch what needs to be touched, and in those replies will be healing in many forms.
          What you do ‘is’ enough. Anything else is creating an imbalance within you. You are sharing to the best of your ability, with much love, you can do no more. Anything else becomes an expectation of yourself or from others.
          What others do is their journey, even if they turn the other way or become upset or even angry, is their path. But trust me, whatever is needed for them, THEY WILL take on board, sometimes without even realising it. Those moments where something occurs later in their future, and what they have heard or seen from you will come back up, and only then reinforce what they are now going through.
          You will have touched because it is given with love, and can now be released by you because their are no expectations. Just keep doing your work with the love that you have become, and it will touch a heart that is ready….now or later. Love is relevant in all circumstances, for us all πŸ™‚
          That is also the gift of the creation of these blogs, it has allowed many who have ‘touched’ that beautiful truth within to be guided to each other and share our journey. We do still become tired or even sometimes disillusioned because we do try to help and guide so many, after all, we are still human :), but that is a lesson also. We cannot give if we are crawling with a load on our backs. Personally I have found that if it is becoming a load, I need to look within to find the culprit. And the one thing spirit did show me was…I cannot give from a broken vessel. Heal me and I then give truly from the heart.
          So I make sure I go for a ‘me’ walk every day, I make sure I take breaks so my eyes don’t go square (too much computer) :), and good breaks with friends to allow my heart to function in different ways. I catch up every second week with a group of like minded souls πŸ™‚ Maybe you can find a like group to share. And in fact, you have now ‘put it out there’, so maybe it is time and you will be out shopping or something and the synchronicity of life will drop what is needed into your lap πŸ™‚ And it is amazing the people you meet when your not looking’ πŸ˜€
          I wanted to heal the world, and I tried to don’t worry πŸ˜€ , but I slowly realised that I was never attracted to anyone that ‘was’ tired or run down, and in fact I was always attracted to people that were coming from a good place, that smiling, happy, relaxed, comfortable person that was giving from that place. So I learned to release many expectations and find that peaceful place within, and now even stray dogs, cats, and even the odd lost child find me and lean against my leg because the ‘energy’ is just nice to be with πŸ˜€ . And I will admit that took some doing, but in that search I found those fears that were driving them, understood why I felt I had to be that way, and released them forever more.
          Now if I can just remove those pesky cockatoo’s that drop in on my balcony for a chat (and leave THEIR messages πŸ˜€ ), I’ll be fine πŸ™‚
          Your heart has been shown a beauty all of its own Amy, you are a beautiful soul, and you are sharing the magic that is you and making more of a difference than you will ever know. I know sometimes it feels like it is a thankless job, always giving on that level. But I found within that, the knowledge that I was expecting too much of myself. Yes, we have been shown a beauty that we really want to share because of what it means to everyone, but as you have found, many are not ready to ‘see’ what we have found. That is why much is written down, it can be ‘viewed and understood’ when it is time.
          I bow to you my friend, accept you for the soul that you have become and the love that you share. It is a beacon in your life…always! Namaste & (((HUGS))) back at you! πŸ™‚ <3 <3 <3

          1. I just had to smile as I read this especially the part about dogs, cats, children wanting to be near you. LOL I take ME time as well. It is a MUST. I recharge by walking in a forest that is powerful, wild, free. Every time I go or for that matter walk in another park, dogs when they see me, strain at the leash to get near me. The “humans” seem a bit embarrassed and apologize but I only laugh. It’s expected. I’m a magnet. Birds same thing. Cats. I not only take care of them, but the barn cat from next door has deemed it necessary to curl up at our front door, so we have made him a nest and now feed him daily … As well as the other barn cats. Yes. I know all about the touches from Nature. Perhaps it is a GOOD thing my Life is the way it is because if the humans ever begin to flock to me, there just may be a stampede. LOL No, Life is GOOD just as is. I’ve learned to be happy with ME and to be truthful I cherish my ME time to be alone with Mother. SO much of my time is giving. I must give to ME as well. πŸ™‚ Namaste and Peace, Mark

            1. Animals just ‘know’ Amy πŸ™‚ It has been an amazing thing to re-connect within ourselves and begin to really ‘see’ nature and feel at peace within it, instead of this rush, rush and never see the forest for the tree’s.
              Thank you for our connection, it has been good to touch base with another. I am looking forward to our blog follow πŸ™‚
              Love and light to you also Amy, may the animals enjoy the piper with no flute πŸ™‚ Namaste

  6. Mark, I have read this post in its entirety. I concur 100% and can say in a lot fewer words what my NDE was like. Most of it has been wiped clean from my memory and only the first part is distinct with a hazy “instinctual awareness” of what actually happened. I was left with no permanent memory of my surroundings.
    In an instant I died. I was hemorrhaging due to a ruptured ectopic pregnancy, which if you do not know is a very critical life threatening situation. While being rushed to the hospital in an ambulance IT happened.
    Instantly I was out of my body looking down. I began to move away but before that happened, in that instant I popped out of my body, I realized how heavy my body was and how tired I truly was. All that fell away and in its place, I felt PEACE and LIGHTNESS as I have never experienced on earth and a state that I can only describe as every single one of my billions of cells filled with Absolute Unconditional Love. In that Moment I knew I AM LOVE.
    Now this is the hazy part. I do not know where I went but it seemed I was present with some who seemed to have some type of Authority. There I was told my time was not yet and I was not finished with what I was born to do. I know I made a fuss for I did NOT wish to go back to this plane of heaviness and pain.
    Moments later I was slammed into my body (it was not a gentle entrance) and found myself being rushed on a gurney down a hospital corridor. I also know that somehow I heard my husband’s voice begging me not to leave him, and that in of itself I THINK is what actually pulled me back here, screaming and kicking. Opening my eyes to gather my wits about me as to where I was, realization took over once more. I was back on earth. At that point I closed my eyes and inwardly screamed NOOOOOOOO! From there I went into deeper shock from loss of blood. This all happened in 1984. As you can see, I am alive and over just the past 3 years have walked smack dab into what I was born to do as is evidence over at Petals. I AM here to touch with Love, to Encourage, to speak Truth, and to share the Wisdom from my own Life and from what I am given through spirit. My photography in of itself if one has eyes, will feel the Touch of Love and Magic I am connected to with Mother. My writings for the most part are what I “hear”.
    There you have it. Most people when I bring up the fact I died and had a NDE, do NOT want to hear about it. My mother is one of them, but again that may change. Ever since I have come back I have been deeply transformed as over years and years of Inner work, I peeled the onion, walking away from fear and dysfunction. To this day I continue to grow. <3

    1. A beautiful story Amy, even though it was a rough journey in how you experienced it. It is always very profound to those going through it, and in that I believe it is so we can come back, understand the journey so that we can give hope to those around us. Even though many fear to look at it. Afraid of ‘that time’ that will one day sneak up on them.
      If they only knew the beauty that was there, as you explained, it was a love like nothing we have ever experienced down here, it is something that truly gives meaning to unconditional love.
      You also met others, even though that side of it is a bit hazy, who said it wasn’t time. I actually didn’t die, but because I am able to connect back in spirit form, I was taken on a journey to ‘see and feel’ what ‘letting go’ meant to me, and explaining that to others. The only presence I felt was ‘everything’, that total connection to all that is. It was so beautiful and stunning in that ‘I am’ state. Not a question at all, everything just was so perfect, my awareness was total. I could sit here all day saying incredible words and still not touch what it all meant πŸ™‚
      I had constantly seen your comments at maryrose’s site (ladybluerose), and there was an awareness towards you but I never ‘connected’ until now. It’s a timing thing, you know, it will come together when we are ready :). Like the N.D.E.’s, they happen, we gradually understand them in how they relate to our lives, and in that we ‘synchronize’ with others, in our healing from them, and then what we give to those others.
      It has been amazing just what connections are made, being aware of those or not, that go where they need to, just by being what we have become because of that experience.
      I am looking forward to hearing more of your journey Amy, now that I am following, and enjoying more of your work, especially of the photo’s that I have already seen. Beautiful work after our hearts are opened, our view becomes so more aware πŸ™‚
      Love and light to you in your journey Amy. Many the layers of that onion we will remove, and all to soon this world down here is left behind, and it is only then we realise just how beautiful is the journey we have taken.
      A struggle it may be, but it is in that struggle that we will find that love within, and realise with great wisdom that it is done with a beautiful purpose, to allow us to understand and ‘be’ that love that we touched ‘up there’ πŸ™‚
      Thank you kind lady for sharing such a beautiful event, it has given me a smile to feel another who has ‘touched’ something so close to our hearts. Mark

        1. Thank you kind lady, as are you. That N.D.E. can do no less than brighten what is already within, and in that light is a guide to many others.
          Just by writing about it will give others hope, and in the grace of their journey, allow others to ‘see’ <3

  7. New reader here Mark. Thanks for sharing your experience. I am coing to terms with my own issues around death so when Sue Dreamwalker recommended this post, I was really happy to read it. Not enough people talk about death- due to fear and a sense of the morbid ( more fear) but I’m finding out that its about letting go of attachments as you have found out with people. My granny spent years telling all of us “I’ll miss you so much when I’m gone.” I think that she had it wrong though…it is us who miss her. However, I find myself feeling the same sentiment. I also have an outpouring of love because even though I was loving to begin with, I feel like dolloping it out now!
    Theres much more to say of course. Thanks for stating the dialog. I have some reading to do on this blog I can tell.

    1. Hi Linda! Yes, death does tend to be tucked away, and usually because of the fear and pain associated with it bring feelings we would rather avoid. But as you have found out, our mortality comes knocking at different times and in your case, much closer to home.
      I too have reached this point with various bits happening to me so that I slowly realised that all in this world really doesn’t matter. In the beginning yes, but after all is said and done and we have realised the truth of our journey, it is only the love of ourselves that is left.
      Even before this post as I stumbled around trying to find meaning in my life, I found that the only time I was really happy was after I had looked within, found what kept me in a state of fear, and broke free by really looking within it to see WHY I felt as I did. It took courage to even look, but when I finally realised what drove that fear and understood why….I let it go…and I am now free….really free, for the first time ever. And life changed, that ‘thing’ that I had held onto forever was no longer prodding me every step I took.
      It may sound a simple thing to do, but it takes heart and courage to be honest with yourself (as we have had a lifetime of hiding it πŸ™‚ ), see it for what it truly is and break through. But the relief, release and outright ‘opening within’ from what you have discovered is something that you will never forget. Your life will never be the same because life is now viewed very differently without a log braced across your back in everything that you do πŸ™‚
      So in stating the above, it also allows us to drop all those ‘needs’ that we think we have to do, and come back inside. And for the first time I could actually say that I was truly happy, not just a ‘great party’ happy that is fine for that day or next week, but something that stays…because I can now truly see what does have meaning for me, and no longer blocked by that ‘fear’ that was always dogging my steps in all that I did.
      Your grandma was speaking from a place of love and fear. Yes, in her human understanding she felt she would miss you all, but in speaking it she also was projecting that unknown that we all hold through our lives. It is only the unknown that make us afraid, once understood it loses its power over us. That is why I did the post and tried to express everything that I understood to allow others to know ‘there is something else, something very beautiful’.
      Your journey is always driven by that need to find a happiness, a release from this world of pain, and we look and look all round. But in experiencing ‘out there’ we slowly realise it is only how we feel within that shows our happiness. That is why the saying of being in a crowded room but all alone. It is what we hold within that comes through our actions, and while ever those ‘fears’ that bind us are present, we can never truly be open, happy and free.
      Don’t let my words discourage you in any way. Just by reading this you are now beginning a new journey, already your awareness has been raised as you have been led to look and find something. Your higher self/God/you is guiding you, or you would never go anywhere and just stumble about forever. Those many synchronicities that have touched you many times in your life is a love like no other, and trust me, it is the most incredible beauty that words cannot describe. I have barely touched its surface, even in the journey’s that I have made. But just inside those walls and barriers we have learned to put up in life to block those fears, sits this beautiful place, a place that is just waiting for you to hold your hand up and tell yourself ‘I’m ready’, I no longer wish to be dragged around by the lies of this world, I wish to be loved, truly loved for who I am.
      And all it takes is for you to now stand in that truth, speak from your heart by saying how you truly feel instead of what you think others expect, say what your heart feels with integrity, as speaking in anger or fear is only a projection and reaction of what you are not saying. You know this when you have those beautiful heart to hearts with one of your children, a partner or family member. You speak openly, a complete truth to another, and because it is done from that truth within it brings a very beautiful, peaceful and loving feeling to you both. It doesn’t matter if the other person has struggled with that truth….because it is YOUR truth. And while ever you stand in that place, it heals, it releases many walls, and allows you that happiness and freedom that we all seek. Many may react to it, but that is their journey. You may be afraid of losing them because of how you spoke…but in truth, that fear is what kept you bound in the first place.
      Stand in that truth and everything will begin to change, you, others, and you will even begin to attract from that place.
      If you wish to see how I found myself in my journey, just follow up on my menu bar, the topics from left to right. You will just connect with whatever has meaning for you. Not all will ring a bell, but more importantly it will guide you, just follow what you feel in your heart.
      Thank you Linda for sharing with me here, I hope it gives you the strength and courage in your journey, may you find what is in your heart. Mark

      1. It absolutely does take honest courage! And no way is it easy…at least I’m finding it a challenge but thats because theres alot for me to do. However, when I looked the topic square in the eye after realizing that I could run but I couldn’t hide, fear began to dissolve. I was filled with anxiety all the time then as I progressed into my work on the matter I have found it to be quite soothing. I also have found that the spiritual world is quite merciful once the guard is dropped. I’ve had helpers in this journey so far.
        You are right that most things dont matter, but as a mother, I’m tending to the needs of my young adult children on the issue- or trying to. I’m dealing with the practicalities as well for the sake of a sick husband and a beloved dog. These things still matter to me. Is it fear? Probably a bit, but its fear for them, not for whats to come after for me. As you said before in your post, we’ll see each other again. Thats where I am on the road at the moment.
        My grandma was definitely afraid of what might come after though she was ready to die by the time she did. Its a process!

        1. It is a big journey, for you and those around you. Just remember, they do need the practicalities of life later, but it is the closeness above all else that has the most meaning. Simply because that is what they want to remember. I think the hardest part is being totally open and honest, even to the point of saying your scared of leaving them behind or what’s to come. It is in letting them ‘feel’ your heart and the honesty you speak from it. It also allows them to release their feelings in speaking it, sharing and healing in that speaking rather than a blocking and holding it in. That is the part that a lot don’t get a chance to because their death happens so suddenly. Many I have heard say…’I wish I had said this or that’ to a loved one. You free grief in that love with each other.
          It is in ‘being strong’ that unintentionally we give a false bravo and they ‘feel’ your not being ‘close’ with them.
          No, it isn’t easy, but it is very free’ing and loving to go the distance and let them, and you, touch what is a love of self by doing this.
          And there are many helpers around you always, touching and guiding your journey so that your awareness of self can reach its destination. Our guard up is only built on our fears, and in releasing that guard it does become smooth because we are now loving to ourselves by no longer fearing what we think is there.
          Each fear, and the wall that it produces, no longer hold any power once we understand those fears. It’s like being afraid to drive a car for the first time…constant asking ourselves ‘can I do this’, ‘I’m afraid I’ll crash it’, and on and on it goes. But after a few months we don’t give it a second thought. The experience of going through any fear builds confidence AND removes the unknown. It no longer has any power over us in that understanding.
          All fears are built the same, and the only reason some are bigger than others is by the power WE give them. And by going through each one we are finally loving ourselves, building that love so that we become a stronger, truer and loving soul to ourselves, and as a by product of that, give that love to others…naturally.
          Our connection with anything in this universe is built on that power alone. That love of self, that everyone points to and says is weak, full of ego etc, is only because of the fears they hold within themselves. Once it is realised, in going through a very stressful time, it builds a quiet and loving strength, and that is felt in the people you meet. Those people that you may have just only met, but you know you would trust them with your life….and the others that you would run a mile rather than be open around them. Yes, that is a protection mechanism, but when we learn to stand in our own truth regardless who we are with….then you are there beautifully balanced within.
          The only time we ever get upset is because WE FEEL something hurting us. THAT is your heart saying we need to look within ourselves and find that fear, understand it and let it go. And I mean inside us, because we ONLY EVER react to someone because of something inside us.
          And when we finally find all those bits, understand why and let everything go, everything changes. The world no longer has you pushed and shoved from pillar to post, even loved one’s no longer have us reacting all over the place at the drop of a tiny comment. Nothing matters because now we are standing in our truth and realise all those things coming at us no longer have any meaning….and in fact we can now see where the fear is, because we have understood and cleared our own, in others because of what we understand within ourselves.
          No truer word was spoken in….we can see the future in our pasts.
          All true understanding really does bring much love. Be the love and trust you would like to see from others, and it will attract accordingly πŸ™‚
          Sending much love and hugs for your journey Linda, may it free that beautiful heart, and in doing so, free others. Mark

          1. Thank you so much Mark. I have a lot to absorb from your writing. I will be back for sure:) I am working through a book called A Year to Live by Stephen Levine. Its for anybody who wants to deal with these issues not for people who know that they are dying per say-its for anybody. His lifes work was with the the dying (he passed in January). He says in the book that the most uttered last words are actually “oh (expletive)”. lol.
            And he also says, you die how you live. So I am out to make the best of myself come forth. I don’t know when I will die but I am grateful that I have had the opportunity to face death now rather than at the moment though who knows right? I know my last words won’t be “oh expletive” but more like (Oh my! How beautiful!). You are one of those helpers by the way. Thank you again and again!

            1. My pleasure Linda. After all that I have said, the best advice I can give is…just follow your heart, you will do what is right for you.
              Just one other thing I will mention, once I dealt with my biggest fear (it was a fear of rejection that was created in childhood and carried all through my life trying to please people so I wouldn’t be rejected), nothing else really mattered. I finally just accepted life instead of constantly worrying. I began to see and enjoy life.
              That one thing is what holds us to ransom. It has great purpose in showing us how to love ourselves, and once understood and released, it really did make all the difference in how I viewed everything.
              If you would like to understand something that I have said, please feel free to ask.
              Love and light for your journey Linda, may it guide you to that love within. Mark

                  1. Btw Mark, thanks for visiting and liking that post on my old blog. I didn’t realize that I hadn’t updated my profile to reflect my new blog where I am active and writing about having advanced cancer. I have updated now. If you hadn’t visited I would not of realized. lol.

  8. What a beautiful passage and poetic capture of your experiences. As I read the words, I could feel my chest/heart/lungs heaving with and then without anxiety. I don’t fear death of myself as much as death taking the people I love. Even in that vein, you managed to ease some anxiety.

    “The grief is one thing that holds us so tightly because of the loss of that loved one and the beauty that was shared, within that loss. But grief has a huge purpose, it allows us to see and feel something that is built on a love like no other. It also allows us, by that loss and pain, to look within and find another love, one built on the empathy that comes from going through such a time, a healing love that leads to that love within.”

    I’ve lost many family members and distant friends, but only one person (thus far) whose death rocked me to the core. Someone I still miss almost 10 years later. Hearing your description gives me comfort in truly knowing he must be in a better place, even if I’m not.

    Then this: “Ask anyone who is in their sunset years knows how fast time really goes down here, it is much faster than we give it credit, and we can see that as we get older. It is a very short time, and within it is crammed a huge amount of beauty, all so we can find ourselves, that unconditional love that is a part of us all. All too soon this magic is swapped for another (up there). But down here, this magic cannot be experienced up there, that is why we are here. This is β€˜our time’ to find that beauty within, not to be experienced in this way ever again. Our journey has great meaning for us all…and then we too will be sharing those beautiful flowers with those we love again.”

    Thank you. Thank you, Mark. xo

    1. My pleasure Michelle. I wish I could roll it out in a documentary to show everyone πŸ™‚ What I experienced came from so many places all at once, and the one word I would use to describe, and the only thing that would even come close to it is….unconditional love. It was just perfect. The only reason that ‘I’ was shocked, was because I needed to ‘see’ it from an anology of what I would understand and be able to describe back here.
      A beauty like no other Michelle, it was weeks before I could really function properly after it, I floated around and just smiled a lot. I’m sure many thought I was on something else, it was that profound πŸ™‚
      And of course we will miss those close to us, as this helps us to look within in that grief and come closer to that love of us. It shows us a finite time down here and points us to things that have much more meaning in our lives…those that we love AND in doing so…our self worth…we let go of many things that no longer have meaning because we can see that we ARE worth so much more than being dragged around by the expectations of this world.
      Thank you for sharing kind lady, may your worth always be on your sleeve for all to see the truth of who you believe you are πŸ™‚ xo

  9. I have the sense I could find something new in each reading, there is such presence of peace and passion in your telling. The energy, at once calm and enthusiastic, is not at all contradictory, but rather curious and engaging. I was intrigued.

    1. Thank you Marie. It is a passion, an understanding of what love is. To be a healer I needed to heal myself first, and in that understanding I saw what love is. Spirit shared such beautiful wisdom in our journey and as I understood each part, spirit urged me to write and share that understanding as a guide to those that walked this journey.
      I could never truly understand until I learned to love myself first…from there I could finally see the truth of what lay within and its purpose.
      It is a constant path but always leading to that love within us all. Those hard parts teach so much compassion and love because we reach that point of ‘I am worth more than this’, and begin that journey of loving ourselves.
      Thank you for sharing a beautiful comment here Marie, it is received with gratitude. May your journey know that blessing of a peace and passion also. Namaste

  10. Wow, Mark, I had no idea of any of your experiences. Amazing stuff. It resonates with so much that I’ve read. And I love the idea of the waiting for your friend while making coffee. It makes it all so much friendlier. Thank you so much for sharing. Will have to read several times to really take it all in . . .

    1. It was a very big post Kay, but I couldn’t really explain everything without expressing all the bits. Spirit has shown me so much, and only because I asked spirit to allow me to be a healer. Spirit with great love showed me my own heart and said very simply…’go through the fears that you hold within, and you will understand’. It shocked me, but I knew why. One of those healer, heal thyself moments πŸ™‚
      But it took me on a journey like no other. Each time I found something within, spirit would enlighten me further. And no, I didn’t get out of anything :), I needed to go through and understand or the wisdom would not be there.
      They are hard paths, but the beauty within each understanding grows each time until you realise it is all so very worth it. You finally touch something that shows there is really something just under the surface, it has been there all along but you weren’t sure at first. But each time there is a little more until you reach a point and understand that is really who you are…it builds your confidence, your love of self and a truth like no other until it becomes second nature. And gradually you are being accepted for who you now are.
      It is an amazing experience to ‘feel’ that total acceptance ‘up there’, that is self love personified, and all in the ‘now’. They ‘know’ we will only be a moment, and also ‘know’ that what we are doing has great meaning for us.
      Thank you for sharing Kay, it is a very friendly and loving journey we are on, it is in understanding those hard bits have great purpose, to heal ourselves and realise that love within. xo

  11. I know this place, Mark. It’s the room next door. It’s always there. It’s always been there. I’ve always known it. They’re always in it. Like the friend who goes home to collect something, there’s no need to worry. A child never worries that it is lost until it knows it is lost. Then it frets until it is found, the parent frantic, all the while, that the child will be afraid, come to harm. We are that child, sometimes getting lost, sometimes being taken. We are that parent too. What you describe is that you know, with clarity, that you will never know that sense of loss again. I forget sometimes, in the face of pain or grief, that I know that place and I am the lost child or worrying parent again. Until I’m found or find the way home or find my child.
    This is a beautiful experience you’ve had and shared. Walking into another room, knowing you will rejoin all those you’ve ever loved could never be a fear. But we make it so. Rationality, disbelief, pragmatism, presumed scientific certainties make it so. Fear and doubt make it so. Life can make it so. Not listening so attentively to that inner voice makes it so. We make it so.
    You remind me well.
    Thank you for sharing this, Mark.x

    1. My pleasure Anne Marie, and you are right, it IS the room next door. In fact it is right inside us, that understanding of who and what we really are within, and the connection we make as we realise that wisdom as we go through so many adventures in our lives.
      The child in us all is happily adventuring just out of reach, occasionally peaking over its shoulder to see if mum or dad are really there, confirmed, and on they go. But sometimes they aren’t, and they can panic…but slowly that wisdom comes to bear that it is ok…I am ok now… I have the strength and courage to go on…I am enough.
      And it needs to be that way so we can understand and build that confidence and wisdom in who we are. Each time testing a new way or being. Confirming by each touching experience and the guidance around us.
      What I felt and saw within that journey was such an incredible blessing. In one stroke it released an age old dilemma that we all face, confirmed an understanding that I was aware of, and allowed me to release so much as all fears do. We never realise that weight as it has always been a part of who we are, it is only in understanding and releasing it that its affect is fully realised.
      And the understanding of what it meant to us has great purpose. It shows us the way home…that love of self. All fears are built on that low worth, rejection and unloved portion we feel. In finding that meaning its power is no longer there…it has now been diminished in that understanding…and we have won the battle. And in that understanding we release those feelings and at last our self worth is given the love that it so rightfully deserves.
      I hope the understanding in my journey may allow another that hope and blessing of seeing and releasing something to allow them to move forward…in strength, courage and a deserving love of self.
      Thank you for a lovely comment my friend, it is always written with a heartfelt wisdom and gratefully received. xo

  12. Mark such a profound post and I so enjoyed your insights in part 2.. ” This is β€˜our time’ to find that beauty within, “.. so very true… Each obstacle, each painful event, each joyful moment through laughter and love we experience that which we need to find our true selves..

    Yet so often we get bogged down by Fear, Fear of not being Loved, fear of failure, Insecurities, jealousies, the list grows as our attachments to others, along with our needs to control gather unto ourselves the never ending list of weights that hold us trapped within our cycles, like a washing machine removing the stains that forever keep going around and around until that final rinse cycle and that final ‘Spin’ πŸ™‚ when the door is opened and we are shook from our creases and blow freely in the wind πŸ™‚ πŸ˜‰

    I am so happy that you were shown this, and Yes sometimes we need time to digest and fathom that which we are shown.. And I know from my own out of body experiences within what is so much more than ‘Dreamtime’ that feeling of elation and clarity, coupled with relief and pure Peace as we let go, knowing that we are all and everything and then some… There are NO Words in our vocabulary that can describe that kind of Utopia…

    Bless you Mark for sharing your insights.. you just helped me settle firmly into my own skin again as I took myself off to dig out my inner self once again that was becoming swamped with the weight of the world….
    Sue <3

    1. Yes Sue, it is a journey like no other. When spirit shared this journey with me I could not possibly give its perfection and love into words, they seemed so inadequate for what I was experiencing.
      Even trying to explain an instant of time was so rich and full of so many feelings and understandings. That was one of the things I did ‘know’ as I understood everything I was shown…I was only shared a very small portion simply because in the ‘space’ that I was in, my human side experiencing our normal spiritual side, could not handle the enormity of what is there. I was only given a small portion and that was so full of information, I had difficulty in trying to bring what I was shown into words as is πŸ™‚
      It can feel like a washing machine in all that we do down here Sue, but it all has purpose. All those crazy rides we go on slowly guide us to understand and find that love within. It doesn’t seem like it at times, but slowly after sometimes so much pain, we are finally forced to look within, and in that space we finally realise what is waiting for us inside. But without those rough times we would never look within, we’d be too busy just enjoying ourselves and avoiding those fears that we hold onto like our lives depended on them….and they do, they have great purpose in guiding us ever inward. We are a tough lot, enduring some of the most horrendous things, but gradually we are brought past the fear, understand them, and in that understanding release our imprisonment of fear and release what had held us for what seems like forever, and finally we are free…really free!
      I do hope you are settling well, this life can become a load again, even after experiencing all that we have. But this time it is with understanding of our journey which really changes our entire outlook, we no longer approach things as we used to, and in that they no longer become a burden as they once did. Mind you, having said that, I have still gone into something and become held by it…but only because that is what I’ve needed to experience for myself. But I know that so it is accepted as such. I’ve even laughed at myself when a bit of my ‘old way’ re-surfaces to show me something πŸ™‚
      Thank you for your lovely blessings Sue, appreciated and returned in kind, may your journey allow that lovely heart within to find the love that we all seek πŸ™‚ <3

      1. And thank you Mark for this wonderful reply.. Yes the rough comes to mould us and I have so thanked all those painful moments for shaping me into who I am today.. I often tell people we may not think the burdens we carry are in fact helping us grow.. It is only looking back we see with more clarity from our ‘Knowing’ that we begin to understand the complex yet simplicity of it all..
        like you I have had visions, taken out or body into the realms where its just taken my breath and no amount of words could ever begin to explain what you have seen and understood within seconds … Its awesome.. πŸ™‚ And its so good to see you laughing at yourself.. It means you really have moved forward along your journey of knowing who you are.. :-)..
        Sometimes like recently I got embroiled within the emotions of the world.. and needed to see that too I needed to let go of for all is as it should be.. Even though our human understanding is not always understanding the complex simplicity of evolution and progression..
        The Yin and Yang both contained within the whole both needed for the cycles to revolve.. πŸ™‚
        May you continue to be enriched upon your journey Mark.. Namaste. Sue

        1. Those touches of another place are such a wonderful event Sue…confirming our journey, blessing us with insights within, and touching us with a love like no other.
          All creating a balance to guide us ever onward.
          And you are so right…when we begin to laugh, really laugh at ourselves and even life itself…we have touched that place within and no longer cover the glow within…that love that lights our way always.
          Thank you for sharing Sue, may that glow always be within πŸ™‚ Namaste

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